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Dad, Mom, and baby Meghan

Dad, Mom, and baby Meghan

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Sunday, November 30, 2008

Ia America really a better place for children and adults with Down syndrome?

I was rereading this blog entry from a fellow adoptive parent: and it got me thinking about Americans and their ideas about disability.

I have also found this article READ HERE and have to say, this woman is speaking for more women than we think she is, I completely disagree with her and find her beliefs horrendous and well, inhumane, she is an advocate for special needs kids too, what does she advocate for? Euthanasia?

Sha writes: "My belief that certain foetuses would be better not coming to term has nothing, logically, to do with my belief that everything possible should be done to help babies who do come to term and are born among us to share our imperfect world. " So you can see my point...

After you have read Linda's blog entry, think about how we handle Down syndrome today. The first thing doctors tell parents who have a prenatal diagnosis is "Well, you can terminate and try again for a healthy child" or ” If you terminate now, it will be within the first 20 week rule" (don't think for a minute that they stay within that, they abort babies who are late term too). I wonder how many give the other options? Do they put the expectant couple in contact with parents who have children with Ds? Do they tell them about support groups? Do they tell them about the waiting list of 200 plus families who want to adopt a child with Down syndrome? From the moms I have spoken to, the answer is a resounding no, they do not tell them any of the positive aspects of choosing LIFE over death for their baby. They fully expect the parents will "want to get rid of" the defective infant before it has the misfortune to be born. We know this because the abortion rate is above 90% for babies with trisomies, spina bifida, and other genetic abnormalities.

Rationally we can assert that the medical profession practices an extreme form of bioethics; they decide who has the right to live and they impose their will on shocked parents and scare them with gloom and doom statistics. I know this is true, I have too many friends who went through it, and I can still hear the pediatrician telling my husband and I to leave Meghan with them and CPS would take her away. That we needed to save ourselves from a life with a defective baby, needed to save our children from the horrible burden of caring for Meghan after we died, after all, we were OLD and would die before Meghan. Was that fair to our kids, WAS IT?

Where are the Right to Life factions when genocide is being exacted upon these children? Who decides their lives are not worth saving, and WHY do people put dollar signs on their lives. I have heard the people who want to protect their wealth whine that these kids are a drain on society. The say the children take taxpayer money and waste it because they do not contribute to society. (They say the same for welfare recipients, and such, actually, they say this about most of us who are not in the upper 10% of income).

After all wealth is more important than the life of a precious child, isn't it, and why would any sane person want to waste their hard earned money on useless and expendable children (and adults)? (this is NOT my belief, I am simply repeating what I have heard in the last 8 years) I hear them speak, they have such conviction in their warped beliefs, they have moral outrage that someone would part them from their hard earned money, I admit, they sicken me. I guess I am supposed to try to love these folks, but I am angered by their egocentricity and heartless beliefs. I want to shake them, I want someone to do a Scrooge on them and show them the harm they do to others. They need to open those eyes shaded by greed and selfishness and see that there are indeed others in the world just as worthy as themselves of occupying it.

I want them to see my beautiful girls and see HUMAN BEINGS WITH POTENTIAL and not just their disability. I know this will never happen. I see the many looks of dismay and disgust when they see us out with our kids. Some folks are very sweet, and thank God for meeting up with them, but others are just so vile in their disgust at seeing "abnormal" children. I shudder when I feel their anger directed at my kids and I know, should they ever have the power, they would do as Hitler did, and exterminate my precious children, and probably myself as well, after all, I had cancer, I too am defective, right?

So many people have told me that these countries in Europe are barbaric for the way they warehouse so many children. They puff out their chests and proudly announce that America is so much better, and I gladly burst their bubble, I say; "Sure, we have early intervention, we have inclusion in schools, people with Down syndrome have jobs, but we abort 90% of them, so how in the world are we better?" They always say they had no idea that happened, and I bet they are mostly correct; many people simply do not know that there is a movement to eliminate Down syndrome births. With the new prenatal testing in the first trimester and the ACOG announcing their excitement, that such a test exists, well, what other purpose does a test like this serve? Do you think it is to help prepare the parents as early as possible for the birth of their children? Thankfully a new law passed the requires doctors to give families ALL of their options when they receive a prenatal diagnosis, thank God for that.

I have prayed about this issue and I will continue to for the rest of my life. I know there are thousands of parents who understand how I feel, we all feel such sorrow over this, every so often I get mad about it and need to vent, today was my day for that.


GoldenAngelsWorks said...

It is sure a shame how the world views these special individuals.

I know when I was pregnant with my youngest daughter... they thought she was going to have a physical defect. They wanted me to give her up. I told them if God wants me to have a special child then I will care for that gift. I pray others can someday see that view.

WheresMyAngels said...

It is so heartbreaking and I tell my mother this is the reason I NEVER base my vote on abortion because I know that not all republicans are against it, that 90% lets me know that for sure.

Doctors think I am a freak because I refused to testing.

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