31 for 21 Day 26 SIT

Tomorrow morning Kara and Amanda will have their first sensory integration session with P, an OT specializing in this type of therapy.

From this website: http://autism.healingthresholds.com/therapy/sensory-integration
Sensory integration therapy is based on the assumption that the child is either overstimulated or under stimulated by the environment. Therefore, the aim of sensory integration therapy is to improve the ability of the brain to process sensory information so that the child will function better in his daily activities.

To be honest, I witness the girls seeking sensory experiences on their own, they certainly do not avoid certain situations because it is sensory overload. Amanda is overwhelmed by new people; but a few hugs and kisses and she adjusts, so we will see. I think there will come a time when I stop listening to people who see my girls once a week and trust myself more. Because they were not born to me, I felt less sure of how to approach their special needs, but we, Kara and Amanda and I, are learning more about one another every single second of the day. I feel more secure in my own decisions and judgements and feel less inclined to listen to others, I know my children better than them, maybe I did not when they first arrived here, but that is not longer the case.

I hope this makes sense to other moms and they can understand what I am trying to say. When you first adopt a child, they are a mystery to you and since you know so little about their personality and their past experiences, you welcome input from others, you need the support, but after a time the support feels more like interference, and it does complicate the bonding process because these strangers are in your home and the children are not certain who these people are, they keep leaving the strangers and sitting with you because they now feel safer with you, and this makes the strangers (therapists) impatient. I do not think any of our therapists have worked with internationally adopted children and they are not at all familiar with post adoption issues and institutional behaviors. These are not children who have lived with a family all their lives, they have attachment issues, they have trust issues, and they need a very patient, loving, and understanding person to help them.

The SIT we see tomorrow is rumored to be all of these things, except I hear she is also very stern, so fingers crossed this will be a positive and helpful experience for my girls, sometimes I feel like we are pushed into too many therapies and at times I feel like it is a negative judgement of my parenting abilities, as if they are saying I am not enough to help my children. And perhaps they do think this, after all, what do they know about me or my family except that one hour they spend with us. My girls are more important than my bruised ego though and I (we) will do what we need to to make up for all they lost their first 3 years.

However I am glad we sought therapy for the girls, they needed the extra help, and for the most part it has been a positive experience with some exceptions. I am a demanding person, I admit it, headstrong, opinionated, I want what is best for my girls and I am getting too old to care if I am not being nice all the time. People do not have to like me as long as they do their best for my children.

I am hoping that P will be as wonderful as A, our ST, has been for our family.